GOING TO SCHOOL
by PsychoMD
Summary: This is a bizarre fan fic that i wrote, i hope you enjoy it, its really quite funny. This is a REPOST of the original version, due to popular demand. (Also, a sequal is coming soon, so i wanted to make sure everyone remembered it!) Please read and review


This is a REPOST of what i guess was a popular spoof from a few years ago. Why am I am dusting this old Fanfic off and putting it up? Because the sequal is coming in about 2 days, and I'd like to remind everyone about this bizzare, but extremely funny fanfic before the sequal comes.  
  
GOING TO SCHOOL by PsychoMD  
  
All right, now I don't own any characters in this story. except maybe the monkey from the Lion King. I am still checking up about that. A warning to those who read this. this story does have some adult themes in it, and language, and a serious lack in political correctness. So, if you are the type that is easily offended, you might want to just go watch the golf channel instead of reading this. Unless you think Golf is a barbaric attack against perfectly innocent grass, in that case I suggest just putting a bag over your head and sitting in the closet for the rest of your life. You might not that, but it will make the rest of our lives easier. But I digress. the rest of you, enjoy! The set part of this story is pokemon, but I have designed this to be a comedy that jumps around, much in the tradition of the Family Guy, or the Critic, so you will quickly find out that it does not STAY with pokemon. Enjoy!  
  
ANNOUNCER: "It's another beautiful day in Pallet town, so just what is our pokemon master in training doing right now? But more importantly, who really gives a shit? You know how much they pay me? 100 bucks an episode. Pikachu gets more money just for taking a Pikashit! I've had it with this crap. I'm out of here. *sounds of footsteps walking away* . . . . . . .  
  
Ash was looking out his window in his home. Thoughts engulfed his mind, "Will I be a pokemon master one day? Is Gary better then me? What was that pokemon I saw the day I became a master? Will I catch more pokemon? Will Misty ever share the same feelings I have for her?"  
  
FIND OUT THESE ANSWERS AND MORE. ON SOAP. *Music plays*  
  
Ash pokes his head up hearing the music, "Wrong show!!!" he shouts!  
  
OH SORRY. *MUSIC PLAYS* DIGIMON, DIGITAL MONSTERS.  
  
"HEY," Ash yelled red in the face, "WE NEVER MENTION THAT KNOCK OFF ON THIS SHOW! DO YOU HEAR ME????" At this moment Misty poked her head in the room, "Ash. who are you talking to?" She asked concerned. "Those damned voices with their theme songs" Ash yelled. Misty looked around the room. "Ash, are you ok?" Ash nodded, "Of course I am. lots of famous people hear voices. remember Fred Flintstone?"  
  
CUT TO SCENE OF A BEDROCK INSANE ASYLUM  
  
Fred is in a insane asylum cell yelling, "I am not crazy, I AM visited by a little green creature called the Great Gazoo! GAZOO! Tell them!" Suddenly, a little green man appears in the air in front of him. Fred exclaims, "Gazoo, thank god you're here. they saw me talking to you and they locked me up, you gotta help me." The green man smiled, and said, "Actually, I've just been screwing with you tubby. see you in hell fat man!" And then disappeared. Fred then started to pound on his cell wall screaming. in the next cell Hannibal Lector was sitting there eating some kind of meat. he yelled over, "Do you mind buddy? I am trying to enjoy a bit of Barney"As the camera pans back you see a purple dinosaur lying on the floor with a big chunk missing  
  
CUT BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Ash was pacing around the room. "I can't believe that the pokemon league is only a week away." Misty nodded her head, "I know, it seems like just yesterday we met. its hard to believe its been more then a year!" Ash agreed, "yeah, think of everything we've been through. remember the first time we met?  
  
FLASHBACK BEGINS  
  
Misty is helping Ash out of the river. Misty yells, "Just what do you think your doing kid?" Ash replied, "I was.. Hey lookout!! It's a Gyarados!" From the small brook a giant Gyarados comes out of the water growling loudly! Ash screams, "Its about to attack!" .But instead gives Ash, Misty and Pikachu ice cream cones. "Hey, it's giving us ice cream!" Ash exclaimed, "Yummy!" Misty replied.  
  
END FLASHBACK BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Ash chuckled, "Now THAT's what I call a sticky situation!" Misty groaned, "Ok ok, everyone gets the South Park reference, can we move on?" Suddenly the door opens to the room and in walks Brock and Tracey. Both with a confused look, "Ash, can you please tell us which one of us is suppose to be in this episode?"  
  
LATER.  
  
Brock is in the kitchen cooking up breakfast, while Pikachu, Togepi, Misty, Ash, and Tracey sit at the table. Apparently no one was able to figure out whether it should be Brock or Tracey, so they just decided to let them both be in it. Tracey was finishing a story, "And so, I got a great sketch of a woman getting pecked to death by Pidgeys!" " Ummm." Ash started to ask, "Shouldn't you have helped. instead of just sketching?" Tracey said, "Well, that's what I do, I'm a WATCHER., not a DO-ER, besides. I would have helped if they were Spearow."  
  
Misty, exasperated, asked, "What difference would that make???" "A big difference," Tracey said, "Lots of people have been attacked by Spearows, but this was so rare, a Pidgey attack, I just had to sketch it!" "Was the woman ok?" "I think she died." "DIED???" Ash exclaimed  
  
"Or she just got up and walked away, do I look like a doctor?." Tracey said, going back to his sketching. "What bothers me is. they replaced ME with HIM!" Brock muttered quietly. "toge toge toge toge toge" Togepi started to chirp out. Misty looked at her pokemon, "What is it Togepi?" Very upset, it cried out, "TOGE TOGE TOGE!!!"  
  
Ash glanced over at Brock, who was cracking eggs for breakfast. "umm. Brock. do you have to do that in front of Togepi?" Ash asked. Pikachu got down from his highchair, and walks outside. coming from the door are sounds of him going to the bathroom. then Pikachu returns smiling, holding a handful of money, which he hands to Ash. Misty stared, and said, "That's amazing!"  
  
"Nah, you should see what he brings back when he masturbates!" Ash exclaimed! Brock scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Its like Meowth's payday. just much more disgusting!" Ash replied, "I can think of worse ways to make a buck."  
  
CUT TO SCENE OF A BEAUTY SALON  
  
A young woman is in an empty room, when another woman sticks her head in, "Ok Cindy, Roseanne is ready for her bikini wax." Cindy shudders.  
  
BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
"Ok guys," Brock said, "Breakfast is ready. Eggs for Ash, Oatmeal for me, French Toast for Misty, Pikachow for Pikachu, Pokemon Pellets for Togepi, and Pokemon Pellets for Tracey." Tracey looked at dish that was placed in front of him, then looked at Brock. "You don't like me very much, do you?" he asked  
  
"What makes you say that?" Brock said starting to eat. Tracey stood up saying, "I should kick your ass you. hey! There's a fly on my food, I gotta trace this!" And he quickly sat down starting to sketch again while everyone stared at him in disbelief.  
  
AFTER BREAKFAST  
  
Brock said, "Don't worry I'll clean up."  
  
AFTER BROCK CLEANS UP  
  
"And I'll put away the dishes!"  
  
AFTER BROCK PUTS AWAY THE DISHES  
  
"Umm. Narrator? Can we get on with the story?"  
  
AFTER BROCK ASKS "Umm. Narrator? Can we get on with the story?"  
  
"That's quite annoying."  
  
AFTER BROCK SAYS, "That's quite annoying"  
  
"KNOCK IT OFF!!!!" Brock shouts at the top of his lungs.  
  
"Uh. Brock?" Misty asked, "Who are you yelling at?"  
  
"Those damned voices!" Brock exclaimed. "Oh don't tell me you hear them too!!!" Misty said. Ash piped up, "Don't worry about it Brocko, I hear them too!" Tracey then said, "I sometimes see dead people." Pikachu then zapped Tracey. "Damnit!" he yelled, "Why did Pikachu just zap me???" Ash explained, "He's a big fan of Tom Hanks, and doesn't like jokes about his movies." Brock replied, "Wasn't Bruce Willis in Sixth Sense?" "Yeah," Ash said, "but originally it was Tom Hanks. but then they re-edited the whole movie with another actor. they change things in movies all the time. remember the Lion King?"  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO SIMBA WALKING ALONG THE PLAINS TO RIFIKI (THE MONKEY)  
  
"You knew my father!?!" Simba asked the wizen monkey. "Correction. I KNOW your father?" Rifiki replied. "I am sorry to tell you. My father died a long time ago." Simba sadly told his elder. "WRONG AGAIN!" The monkey exclaimed, "He's alive follow old Rifiki and I will show him to you!"  
  
And then Rifiki quickly ran out ahead of him and Simba quickly ran after him. and finally, caught up with him in a clearing. "In there." The monkey pointed to tall grass. And Simba walked through the grass and saw. his dead father's carcass hanging up like a puppet. Rifiki pulled some strings so the body's mouth opened and closed and the monkey in a high pitched voice mimicked Mufasa's voice, "Hello Sonny boy, have you been eating all your veggies?"  
  
Simba horrified stared with his mouth opened. To which Mufasa, *Rifiki* said, "Better not keep your mouth open, with all these flies around me one might fly in your mouth!" "This. This is horrible! You took my father's body you sick little monkey!" Simba yelled in disgust. "Why did you do this???"  
  
"Oh." Rifiki said, "Its just something I do. look what I did to Bambi's mom!" *points over to a skeleton of a deer hanging up like a puppet. Bambi's mom/Rifiki, "Hello big boy. wanna get me something to eat. I'm ALLLL skin and bones. actually I'm just bones. ha ha ha." Simba stares in open mouth horror.  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Ash continued his argument, "Or how about the missing scene from Snow White?"  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO GRUMPY  
  
Grumpy yells out, "HIIIIIIIII HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" We back up to see Grumpy is standing in a room with a bunch of scantily clad women. The head of the bordello yells at him, "Yes yes, hello, do you want good suckie suckie?"  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
"I would have enjoyed the movie if that scene was in it!" Brock said." Misty was the one to change the subject, "So Ash, what are we going to do today?" Ash looked up from his plate, "I am not sure what we should do today?" Then in Brock's direction, "What do you think Brock, what kind of training should we do today?" Tracey muttered, "No one ever asks me what kind of training we should do, it's always Brock."  
  
Misty replied, "That's cause you don't DO anything. you just draw!" A hurt Tracey quickly defending himself, "Hey, drawing is not just an art form, it's a PASSION! Why do you think Da Vinci cut off his ear?" Brock said, "Are you sure Da Vinci cut off his own ear? I've heard another story."  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO ITALY DURING THE RENESSANCE  
  
In a museum of paintings a dark figure stalks through the isle of portraits in the middle of the night. Suddenly the lights come on, revealing the figure is a man covered in metal, with blades sticking out of his wrists, much like Wolverine's claws. "Who do you think you are???", the figure yelled to the man that turned on the lights. The four men were armed with Ninjitsu weapons. "I am Leonardo, master of the Kitana blade." The man yelled back, "And I know you are here to steal these painting, but you'll have to come through ME Shredder!" The two warriors clashed and in the ensuing battle, Shredder's blade sliced off Leo's ear. But before Shredder could finish his attack, the hero managed to run his sword through the stomach of the villain! A scantily clad woman ran up to Leonardo and hugged him, "Oh, Leo, you are wounded." She said, "Everyone will know your secret." "Don't worry Mona," He said, "I will just tell everyone I chopped off my own ear. that way, I will be free to fight crime another day."  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
"Are you out of your mind?" Misty asked, "That story's insane! It's not even correct!" "At least the status quo has been met so far in this story." Ash said finishing his breakfast. Misty muttered, "I wonder if I can get a job with the Sailor Scouts." Ash ignored her and said to Brock "Do you have any ideas what kind of training we could do today?" "Actually I do," Brock said scratching his chin, "I heard that Professor Oak is giving a talk about the properties of pokemon that evolve naturally, opposed to those that evolve through the use of a stone." "Sounds boring" Ash said "It probably will be," Brock replied, "But look at it this way, if you can stay awake through one of Professor Oak's monologues, you will be able to stay awake to catch any singing pokemon."  
  
"ALRIGHTTT!" Ash screamed leaping up from the table sending flying off to the side, nearly crushing Pikachu who just managed to leap out of the way, "I AM GOING TO GO AND BE ABLE TO CATCH THEM ALL!" "He gets excited doesn't he?" Misty muttered to Brock. "There's nothing wrong with that, Misty" Brock reminded her, "Remember, a strong will can move the most stubborn mountain." "What the hell does that mean?" Misty asked. Brock shrugged, "I dunno, I read it off some fortune cookie last week, but the audience expects me to say stuff like that." Misty sighed, "That's true, you have to give the audience what they want."  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO A TALK SHOW  
  
Jerry Springer walks among his audience talking to the young woman in a violet dress sitting on stage. "So Daphine," Jerry said, "I am sure you know why you're here." Daphine nodded, and replied, "I was told that I someone I know well is here to confess their love for me."  
  
"That's right" Jerry confirmed, "Do you have any ideas who that person might be?" "Oh, I hope its Fred," Daphine wished, "He's always goes with me when we split up when we are solving some mystery, so I know he has been the one who has been sending me those sexual letters."  
  
The audience murmured and Jerry said, "Well lets see who your secret admirer is!" And out comes a young woman with a orange sweatshirt and glasses holding a red rose. "VELMA?" Daphine gasped turning red in the face. The audience flipped out at this, chanting "JERRY, JERRY, JERRY, JERRY"  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
The 4 young heroes were walking along route 69 to go to Pokemon University. "Why didn't Professor Oak just hold his presentation at his lab?" Misty asked. "Oh, you know Professor Oak," Ash said, "He's always been a bit eccentric. remember that time the Professor tried to catch a Diglet?"  
  
FLASHBACK  
  
Professor Oak, stalks on the screen carrying a gun and wearing a large deerstalker cap, looks at the screen. "Shhhhhhh.. Be vewwy vewwy quiet. I'm hunting wiglets! Heheheheheh" Then stalks off the screen.  
  
END FLASHBACK BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Finally they arrived at the university. "Oh wow," Misty gasped, "Would you look at all the trainers that have come here to see Professor Oak?" Tracey quickly sits down on the grass, "I have to trace this!" Everyone looks at him, then walk away leaving him behind. Inside the building Ash was admiring the sheer size of the school, "I can't believe that this school is so large!" Brock reminded Ash, "Don't forget Ash, Lots of people have dreams of becoming Pokemon Masters. Thousands every year, usually only ONE of those thousands are able to actually become masters.  
  
The odds are high, and the dream is one. But hope, yes, hope is there to keep even the lowest novice ambitions hot. and that, THAT, my friends." Brock stops and notices that Ash and Misty have wandered off, "Damn kids.. with their short attention spans, and their music. and bubblegum.*trails off mumbling*" Still mumbling Brock jogs to catch up with his pals.  
  
Ash, with Pikachu, and Misty, holding Togepi, had found a group of pokemon trainers getting ready to have a battle. "My Cloyster is at level 23!" one boasted. "Yeah well my Bulbasaur evolved into an Ivysaur!" another boasted. Yet another boy, whose surrounded by girls, "Well, my ONIX is over 6 feet long!" Another asked, "Is he talking about the pokemon?"  
  
Ash quickly jumped into the middle, quick to make an ass of himself. "That's nothing, I have all 8 badges, and on my way to be a pokemon master!" "What kind of pokemon do you have?" a tall young man asked. "Well, I have a Pikachu, a Bulbasaur, a Squirtle." Ash explained The same young man scoffed at him, "that's nothing. all unevolved pokemon." "HEY" Ash defended, "You don't have to be evolved to be powerful!"  
  
QUICK SCENE CHANGE TO A ROOM  
  
Ross Perot is seen standing in the room, eating a banana scratching himself, he turns around to his desk, showing a long furry tail.  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
"Oh yeah, big mouth?" The young man said, "Well why don't you put your pokemon where your mouth is?" Ash stared blankly at him, "That's sick, dude" he finally said.  
  
The young man turned red and yelled, "THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!" "That's what you said." Misty muttered. "Yeah," Brock agreed, "I've heard of poke'feliacs before but I have never met one of them."  
  
"Disgusting" Ash said. "Pika!" Pikachu agreed while hiding behind Ash's leg. Togepi was hiding in its shell from the pervert. "ENOUGH OF THIS!" The young man yelled, "My name's Rick, and I challenge you to a 2 on 2 pokemon match!"  
  
"You got it!" Ash declared, "Let's go outside!" The whole group started to head outside, Misty leaned over to Brock and whispered, "How is it that Ash manages to get challenged by complete strangers?" "I guess he has that kind of face. you know, like that magician we met early on in our travels."  
  
Brock reminded, "Remember Melvin the Magician?" "Oh yea.. That freak." Misty muttered. "MISTY. BROCK!" Ash yelled, "Hurry up, or you'll miss my victory!!!" "Confident. isn't he?" Misty asked. Brock replied, "A LOT can be said for confidence."  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO A BOXING RING  
  
The announcer yelled, "IN THIS CORNER. at 7'10", 500 pounds, the mountain of muscle. Killerrrrrrr CRUSHER!!! And in this corner. TINKERBELL! The small fairy yelled, "BRING IT ONNNNNNN!!!!" and charged foaming at the mouth.  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
There was a circle of kids surrounding Ash and Rick as they prepared to fight. "Alright, this is going to be a one on one fight" Rick said. "You said 2 on 2." Ash corrected. "Fine. we'll have a 2 on 2 pokemon battle.. Happy?"  
  
"I don't really care. its just that you said 2 on 2 then you said one on one." Rick: "If you didn't care why did you correct me?" Ash: "Well I was just making sure, there's a big difference between one on one and 2 on 2." Rick: "It would only be a one pokemon difference."  
  
Ash: "Yes but it would be sudden death." Rick: "True. but with 2 on 2 you could still only use one pokemon." Ash: "I know, but at least you'd be able to have a back up." Misty interrupted this exchange, "ALRIGHT ALREADY!!! Are you going to get started or what?"  
  
ANNOUNCER: "WILL ASH BE ABLE TO WIN THIS BATTLE? WILL ASH BE ABLE TO IMPRESS HIS FRIENDS AND THUS MAKE MISTY THINK MORE OF HIM? WILL TEAM ROCKET PLAY A PART IN THIS STORY AT ALL? WILL THESE QUESTIONS BE ANSWERED? WILL THERE BE MORE GOOFY SIDETRACK STORIES? A BETTER QUESTION IS, WILL THERE BE MORE GOOFY MOVIES? WHAT DID YOU THINK THE SECOND GOOFY MOVIE? DO YOU THINK DISNEY"S MOVIES HAVE JUST GOTTEN TRIPE? WHATS THE DEAL WITH A NEW LITTLE MERMAID MOVIE? DO THESE QUESTIONS HAVE ANY RELEVANCE TO THE STORY, OR DO I JUST GET PAID PER WORD?  
  
"ENOUGH ALREADY!!!" Ash yelled, "WE'RE TRYING TO BATTLE!!!" Misty frowned, "Oh god. don't tell me it's the voices again!" Ash took off his hat and scratched his head, "I know I heard it. didn't you?" Everyone shook their heads. Rick cleared his throat. "Can we get started?"  
  
"Alright, lets start this, I choose youuu Squirtle!" Ash wound up while lights flashed around him and threw out his pokeball, which revealed a small turtle. "How the hell does Ash get those lights to flash when he throws out his ball?" Tracey, who just wandered up to his friends, asked. Misty shook his head, "I dunno, but I hear a lot of people are trying to copy it."  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO THE WHITE HOUSE  
  
Bill Clinton spins around in a circle then stops pointing to Al Gore, "I choose you, AL!!!. Damnit! Let's try this again." Bill starts to spin around again. Hillary leans over and whispers to Al, "How long has he been doing this?" "About 15 hours now. he got sick and dizzy and threw up about 4 hours ago, but he started up again an hour ago."  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
"Awww how cute." Rick said mockingly, "But take a look a pokemon you've never seen before. I CHOOSE YOU JAMICAMON" The ball flew out and popped open, revealing a 3-foot lizard pokemon that stands on two feet, which looks like a Machop. The difference is that it's a dark green, with dread locks, and a Rastifarian hat. "Mon Mon hey, mon" the pokemon said.  
  
QUICK SCENE CHANGE TO A NEWS ROOM  
  
A distinguished man sitting at a desk looks at the screen and clears his throat, and says in a monotone voice "We interrupt this fan fic for a quick announcement. This fan fic hasn't even been finished yet and we have gotten many flames already. This is unprecedented. And with the upcoming fight, it looks like more flames will be coming. The author of this story thought long and hard about what to do about these flames. One thought was to ignore them, but that thought was abandoned as soon as the next batch of flames reached him. The next though was to just not answer the mail. but that doesn't work, cause then he realized he'd lose the compliments as well. The thought of ending this story here was abandoned because there are many people who are enjoying this tale. So finally after much thought, he has come up with this idea. So the author of this story, has asked me as a personal favor to come here, and say, "Fuck you, you lifeless losers. Don't take these jokes so personally." Thank you, and enjoy the rest of the story.  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
"What the hell is that thing?" Ash asked, checking his pokedex, which told him, there was no data available, "Augh, damnit, this thing is useless since I upgraded to AOL .0!" Rick laughed and said, "Lets start this battle. JAMACAMON, DREDLOCK WHIP!"  
  
Obediently, the pokemon whipped its head around slashing into Ash's Squirtle with its long thick wads of hair. The move was so powerful it sent Squirtle onto its back and skidding backwards a few feet! "Augh!" Ash exclaimed, "Squirtle counter with a skullbash!" "Squirtle!", Squirtle nodded and leapt to its feet, and drove itself headfirst into its opponent. The torpedoing turtle slammed hard into Jamacamon and sent the lizard flying backwards. "YES!" Ash exclaimed, "Nice move, now use your watergun." Squirtle shook its head no. "What's the matter Squirtle?" Ash asked. Brock yelled to Ash, "Remember Ash? Squirtle has that rash and it hurts when it squirts!"  
  
"Oh, Right," Ash remembered, "Alright, use your tackle attack!" Rick smiled and yelled, "Use your Bong Bash!" And when Squirtle was in rang, Jamacamon pulled out a long bong and slammed it into the Squirtle's side, knocking it out of the way. "Now finish it off with your Reefer breath!" Jamacamon then obediently spewed out a cloud of smoke which, when Squirtle inhaled, caused the small turtle to grin stupidly and laid down.  
  
"SQUIRTLE!" Ash yelled, "Get up and use your skullbash again!" Brock shook his head, "Its no use Ash, Squirtle's high as a kite!" Dreamily Squirtle had put on its shades and was singing to itself, to the beat of purple haze, "Squirtle. squirt squirt squirtle."  
  
Ash sighed, and complimented, "That's a good attack. Squirtle. return" And the pokemon, with no will to resist, was pulled back into its pokeball, "But you cant beat my NEXT pokemon, show them what you got Pikachu!"  
  
Obediently Pikachu leapt in front of Ash, ready for battle. "PIKA!" He shouted. Rick laughed, "Why don't you just surrender now? Your puny Pikachu can't beat my Jamacamon!"  
  
"What's the deal with that thing anyway?" Ash asked, "That's just wrong! Do you know how many flames we are going to get calling us racist?" "Oh, its just humorous. it was either this or a creature called, 'Pikajew'. MOTZA BALL ATTACK!" "Hmmm. I think that would have been worse." Ash replied. off to the side. Brock was chuckling, "hehe, Pikajew. that's cute. hehe" SMACK!!! Brock went down hard as Misty caught him in the back of his head with her foot. "DON'T ENCOURAGE HIM!" Misty yelled.  
  
"Oh man, Brock's been drop kicked, I gotta sketch this!" Tracey declared. "If you pull out that pad," Brock warned, face still buried in the ground, "I am going to shove your pencil so far up your ass you'll be wiping your nose with an eraser." Tracey took the hint.  
  
"Enough of this," Rick yelled, "Finish off that Pika-wimp with your Reefer Breath!" "PIKACHU! Use your Agility, just say no to drugs!" Ash ordered. "Ugh" Brock muttered, "Is this a cartoon or a public service announcement?" "Lots of cartoons have morals," Misty reminded him. "That's right," Tracey said, "Remember those old G. I. Joe's cartoons."  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO A MILITARY BASE  
  
A man is scene walking around in a frilly nightgown around the barracks. He gets to Joe's bed and starts massaging him under the covers. G. I. Joe wakes up in disgust, rolls out of the bed, pulls out his revolver and blows the man's head off. Joe then covered in blood, smiles at the camera and says, "Just remember kids, say no to gays in the military."  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO THE MAIN STORY  
  
"That was just horrible" Misty criticized. Brock muttered, "We're going to get letters." Meanwhile, Pikachu quickly dodged to the right, the cloud of smoke passing by Pikachu. "Grrr." Rick growled, "While he's close, use your Bong Bash!" Ash quickly yelled out after Rick, "Pikachu counter with your thunderbolt!" Jamacamon swung his metal beer bong at Pikachu, but Pikachu, leapt over it and shocked the weapon. The metal conducting the shock directly into the rival pokemon. The lizard shook from the powerful attack, then collapsed, fainted.  
  
"Augh!" Rick gasped, "Jamacamon, return. that Pikachu is tougher then it looks!" "PIKA, Chu," Pikachu said, Translation: *Damn straight, Bitch!* "But it'll never defeat THIS pokemon! GOOOO NIDORAN!" Rick yelled And out popped a Nidoran. or what looked like a Nidoran. once you got a good look at it, it was obvious it was a rabbit. painted blue, with spikes glued on it. "My Nidoran is level 99, you better not mess with it, just give up."  
  
Ash glared at the 'pokemon'. "I don't want to criticize. but that's not a pokemon." "How dare you insult me that way!" Rick replied indignant, "That is TOO a pokemon, and you call yourself a trainer."  
  
Ash got annoyed at this. "It's NOT a pokemon, it's a rabbit!" Rick made a face, then said, "It is not, it's a Nidoran. Look it's doing its bite attack!" Indeed. the "pokemon" was biting. actually, more like nibbling on the grass. "Oh come on!"  
  
Ash yelled, "It's not attacking, it's eating grass!" "Your just afraid of it!" Rick declared. "NO I AM NOT" Ash yelled exasperated, "IT'S A GODDAMN RABBIT!!!!!"  
  
"I'm afraid the twerp is right." said ???? "That's one pokemon we won't be swiping" added ????? ????: Prepare for trouble! ?????: And make it double! "ooooo" Ash said mockingly, "Look at those ?'s. I can't imagine who could be entering into this story."  
  
????: To protect. blah blah blah blah ?????: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. ????: JESSIE! ?????: JAMES! ????: Team rocket blasts off at the speed of light ?????: Surrender now or prepare to blight. uh.. Fight.  
  
Ash looked at the two members of team rocket, shaking his head in disbelief. Before he could say something, Tracey nearly leapt over Brock so he could get in position, "Oh my god, Team Rocket. I have to trace them!!!"  
  
"What the hell is his problem?" ???? asked. ????? replied, "I have no idea., but it doesn't matter, hand over that Pikachu!"  
  
"You know. you guys really do suck as villains, don't you?" Misty asked. Brock then added, "Yeah, and enough with all those ?'s THEY SAID THIER NAMES!" "We don't suck!" Jessie exclaimed. "Yeah!" James added, "We are just as good as that really famous criminal. 'Cartman Sandiego."  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO THE STATUE OF LIBERTY BEING LIFTED AWAY BY A LARGE HELICOPTER.  
  
A young detective points up to the incredible sight of the Statue of Liberty being stolen and yells, "Oh my god, its Cartman Sandiego!" A small, very fat person dressed in red is seen standing on the torch of the statue, and is heard crying out, as the statue is taken away, "BEEFCAKE!!!!"  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Ash sighed, "If you really wanted our Pokemon, shouldn't you at least have set a trap or something?" James scratched his head, then said, "We could build a hole."  
  
Misty yelled, "God damnit! You always build holes, and it never works!" Jessie then said, "ENOUGH of this! Its time to have a pokemon battle!" She reaches into her pocket and throws out something, which just lands on the ground.  
  
Ash looks at it, and says, "Oh no, is that some kind of bomb???" Brock looked at it and said, "No. its not a bomb. what is it?" Jessie blushed, "Oops. that's my diaphragm, can I have it back?"  
  
All 3 twerps just stared at it. then Ash spoke up, "Lady. if you think I am TOUCHING that thing, you are crazier then Regis Philbin!  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO REGIS'S DRESSING ROOM.  
  
The star of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire is sitting alone in the dark, rocking in his chair, just saying to himself, "I am a star. I am a star, I'm the reason they watch, they have always watched me, Kathy Lee was just some bitch dragging me down, I had to kill her, it was the right thing to do, yes it was the right thing to do, I had to do it, I had to do it for the sake of my fans."  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Misty glared at Ash and said, "That's ridiculous, Regis isn't insane. he's actually the creature from that movie."  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO THE MILLIONARE SHOW  
  
Regis is sitting in the chair facing his contestant. "Alright, Mr. Lickdicker, you are now up to the 64,000 dollar level. your question is.  
  
Pikachu is Japanese for. A) Merchandising Godsend, B) Electric Mouse C) Devil in disguise to steal your money D) One cute enough to induce vomiting.  
  
The man thinks about his choices, beads of sweat dripping from his forehead. with a shaky hand he reaches for his glass of water, but accidentally spills it on Regis. The water lands in Regis's lap, soaking him. Regis screams, "You cant get me wet!" and yelled in pain falling to the floor. To the shock of everyone Regis make starts to bulge out, and his jacket rips away as 3 gremlins crawl out starting to kill the audience. Howard Stern was in the audience watching this and says, "That's exactly how I was born!"  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Brock scratched his chin and said, "I think I remember that episode." The villains cleared their throats, "Have you guys forgotten us?" Ash grumbled, "I wish." "We really don't get the respect we deserve, do we James?" Jessie asked. James would have responded but he was to busy admiring a dress a young lady was wearing. "So where did you pick that lovely dress up? That would just look PERFECT on me, I could wear my blue eyeliner, and."  
  
James words were cut short as Jesse pulled a fan out of her pocket and slapped James in the head with it. "Woah, James got hit in the head with a fan." Tracey said. Brock interrupted and finished  
  
Tracey's sentence, "I have to trace this. right?" "Must you mock the art I love?" Tracey asked. Misty interceded, "I just think its cool how cartoon characters are able to pull anything they want out of their pants."  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO A BUGS BUNNY CARTOON  
  
Elmer Fudd approaches Bugs Bunny who is trapped in a corner. "Now I got you, you wascilly wabbit." Elmer fires a shot, and singes Bug's foot.  
  
Bugs gapes at Fudd then says, "Oh now you did it." He reaches into his 'pocket' and pulls out a well dressed man with a briefcase, the man promptly says, "Excuse me sir, but I am here to represent my client in a Civil Suit."  
  
Furious, Fudd throws down his gun and says, "Ooooooo, wuck you!" Bugs retorted, "Ahhhh, suck my carrot stick."  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
We see our heroes facing off each other, we see a close up view of Jesse, James, and Meowth, words appear under them: TEAM ROCKET (PIKACHU GRABICUS) Similarly, we then see a close up of Ash, Brock, Misty, and Pikachu. Under them words appear: ASH AND CO. (ENTUSIACTICA TWERPUS)  
  
"Alright, its time to start this battle!" Ash cried out Off to the side a man in a suit yells out, "LETS GET READY TO RUMMBBBBLLEEEEEE" Brock smiles and says, "I love that." Tracey cries out, "I gotta sketch him!"  
  
Brock: "If you say that one more time. Brock is interrupted by Jesse yelling, "Arbok, go!" Arbok quickly wraps around a man who was watching the previous battle. "Snakes." Indy Jones said, "It HAD to be snakes, I HATE snakes!" Jesse yelled over, "NOT HIM! THEM!!!" *Pointing over to the twerps* James throws out his ball, and the predictable pokemon, Wheezing, comes out. Ash throws out his own, "Go Bulbasaur"  
  
Ash orders his pokemon to use vine whip.  
  
James orders his pokemon to use smog attack.  
  
Jesse orders Arbok to use wrap attack.  
  
Tracey orders himself to trace this battle.  
  
Brock orders Tracey to knock it the @$%* off.  
  
Misty orders Brock not to kill Tracey.  
  
Pikachu orders a hotdog with lots of ketchup.  
  
Fans order the author to get on with it!  
  
AND SO.  
  
The author gets on with it,  
  
Pikachu eats his hotdog,  
  
Misty stops Brock from killing Tracey  
  
Brock throws out his pokeball so Zubat comes out to join the fight,  
  
Tracey starts to sketch.  
  
Arbok wraps around Tracey causing Brock to cheer.  
  
Bulbasaur vine whips Wheezing.  
  
Wheezing spins around and spews gas on James.  
  
One Fish Two Fish  
  
Red Fish Blue Fish  
  
The battle ensues, Arbok takes out Bulbasaur, and Wheezing wipes out Zubat. "I don't believe it Jess," James said, "But we are actually winning!" "Yeah, what's next? The Rams winning the Superbowl?" Meowth commented.  
  
Finally Ash declared, "Enough of this! Charizard, I choose you!" Misty quickly asked, "Ash? Is that a good idea? Charizard isn't really controllable." Ash replied, "Ah, don't worry, what's the worse that could happen?"  
  
Charizard pops out of his pokeball, a large orange fire-breathing dragon. It spewed fire straight up into the air, bellowing a loud roar. Then it turns its gaze on Tracey and blasts him with his flame-thrower attack! "OH MY GOD!!!" Ash cried out, "THEY KILLED TRACEY!"  
  
Pikachu: "Pika pi pi!" *You bastards!* Tracey poked his head up, "I'm not quite dead." And you if you listen close, you can hear Brock mutter, "Damn" Misty looked at Ash, "Shouldn't a blast of fire like that kill someone?"  
  
Ash shrugged and said, "This is a cartoon, you can't show death in cartoons anymore. not after what happened on the Smurfs.  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO THE SMURFS VILLAGE  
  
Handy Smurf is standing on top of the mushroom house about to jump, yelling, "I've had it up to here with my 'smurfing' life! It's fix this, fix that, well SMURF all of you!" Papa Smurf muttered, "My god, he's drunk as a skunk! How much Smurf Berry Juice has he been drinking?"  
  
It was to no avail, Handy leapt to his demise. horrified, someone asked, "Someone should tell Smurfette, hey, where is she?"  
  
Over at Smurfette's hut is a line of smurfs. One walks out looking very pleased, Smurfette calls out, "Now serving number 45."  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Misty grimaced. "We are going to get in sooo much trouble for this story." Ash shrugged, and tried to call back Charizard before he could do any real damage. But Charizard wasn't through with his rampage yet. He charged Team Rocket.  
  
.WE INTERUPT THIS SCENE OF VIOLENCE FOR THIS SPECIAL REPORT SCENE CHANGE TO A MAN SITTING AT A NEWS DESK.  
  
"Hello readers" The man in a business suit says looking at the screen, "I am sorry to regret to tell you that we cannot show the follow scene, titled, "Charizard's bloody rampage". Censors deemed this too violent for a fan fic of the a PG-13 rating. It's too bad too, cause WOW, your missing something alright. But anyway. since we are not showing you this scene, we have instead decided to show you this special film clip. Enjoy.  
  
FILM BEGINS. "The Differences Between Pokemon And Digimon"  
  
A man looking a bit like professor oak stands in the center of the screen. "Oh, Hello. With the popularity of both Digimon and Pokemon, there are some that claim that Digimon is actually a knockoff of Pokemon. This is as far from the truth as it can possibly be. For instance, the main character of Pokemon, is Ash Ketchum. *The screen changes showing pictures of each point the man makes.* A 10 year old boy from Pallet Town. The main star of Digimon is Crash Gotthem, an 11-year-old boy from Pellet Town.  
  
Ash needs to collect 8 badges from Gym Leaders so he can compete in the Pokemon league. Crash needs to collect 9 idols from Digi-leaders so he compete in the Digimon Cup. Ash's favorite Pokemon is the adorable electric mouse, Pikachu. Crash's favorite Digimon is Digichu, and it uses lightning attacks. Even the mottoes are completely different. Pokemon: Gotta Catch them ALL! Digimon: Wanna DIGI all of them! Well I hope that clears things up. enjoy the rest of the fan fic."  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY.  
  
The school is destroyed. The surrounding forests engulfed in flames. People burned running for safety. The flowers just recently planted. trampled. The ground. its still there, but if it could have been damaged it would have been. Ash stands with Brock, Misty, and Tracey, who is of course sketching the horror, surveying the damage. Charizard has finally been called back. "Hmmm." Ash said, "In retrospect,  
  
I probably shouldn't have released Charizard so soon after we had him neutered." "Well," Brock said, "Bob Barker would be proud of you." "But it was stupid of you to release him like that. but it wasn't the worst decision we ever made. remember that time we guest stared on WWF Smackdown?" Misty reminded.  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO THE WWF ARENA  
  
Ash, with Pikachu on his shoulder, is standing on the walkway to the ring, and the WWF Superstar, The Rock is standing next to him. Ash says, "Hi, I'm Ash Ketchum, a pokemon trainer from Pallet Town."  
  
The Rock starts shouting at Ash, "Who do you think you are talking to the Rock? ASS Ketchum? Do you think the Rock gives a monkey's ass what type of pokemon you've caught? Well what kind DO you have?"  
  
Ash starts to say, "Well I have a."  
  
The Rock quickly shouts, "IT DOESTN MATTER WHAT KIND OF POKEMON YOU HAVE! You can take all those pokeballs and toss them in a big pile of monkey crap! But here, I'll tell you what you CAN do on this show. in front of the MILLION. and MILLIONS, of the Rock fans. Go get some eggs. and feed them to this yellow rat of yours. get his coat NICE and shiny. then comb. his nice shiny fur. then turn that yellow son of a bitch sideways, and SHOVE IT RIGHT UP, YOUR PIKACHU FU***** ASS!!! IF YOU SMELLLLLLLLLLLL WHAT THE ROCK. IS. COOKING."  
  
*The Rock's music starts to play and the Superstar just stands there not moving*  
  
After a few minutes with the Rock still standing motionless, and the fans still cheering, Ash stands there stunned and mutters, "Someone help me. please."  
  
The camera pans over to see Brock on D Von Dudley's shoulders about to be powerbombed through a table, "Uh. I'm a little busy here Ash."  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Walking away from the scene of destruction, Ash and Co. are strangely quiet. Misty looked over at Ash and said, "You know Ash, it was an accident, you didn't know Charizard would do so much damage."  
  
Brock agreed, "yeah, part of your training is to gain knowledge about pokemon, and about life. Your still have much training to do. but so does everyone else."  
  
Tracey agreed, "Yeah, even Drake has training to do. there is always more to learn. So don't feel bad."  
  
Ash looked up from his thoughts and said, "Oh. I wasn't thinking about what Charizard did, I had something else on my mind."  
  
"Penny for your thoughts," Misty said. "Well. do you remember the Snorks?" Ash asked, "What was the deal with that thing on their head? They are always underwater, so its not used for breathing."  
  
Misty yelled, "WHAT KIND OF THOUGHT IS THAT???? Brock snapped his fingers, "We were THIS close to be coming a SERIOUS story."  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO AN UNDERWATER SETTING.  
  
A snork, a Smurf like creature that lives underwater and has a snorkel sticking out of its head is scene standing on the bottom of the lake. He is quickly stroking his long snorkel. Faster and faster running his hand up and down along the long tube on the top of his head. Finally with a moan he spews a burst of air bubbles which float to the top. "Damnit!" another snork yelled, "If your going to make yourself burp, say excuse me!"  
  
*BET YOU THOUGHT HE WAS DOING SOMETHING ELSE DIDN'T YA!  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
In Team Rocket's HQ, we see the Boss sitting at his desk, with the same scowl he always maintains. A subordinate knocks on his door and enters his office. He says, "Sir, field agents Jesse and James have sent you this pokeball."  
  
The Boss took the container and held it in his hands. "It's about time they got something right. you are dismissed." "Thank you sir," The man said bowing and quickly leaving.  
  
"Hmmm." The Boss said examining the ball he held firmly in his hand. "I wonder what kind of pokemon those 3 losers were able to steal?" With just a press of a button, the ball opened, and out released. Jamacamon! The small lizard spewed its reefer breath. The room quickly filled with a pale gray smoke. "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?" the Boss yelled standing up, "WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON THOSE. On those. on. on." The Boss sits back down in his chair, and starts to laugh.  
  
He inhales deeply and says, "Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet." A minute later, Jesse and James enter his office. They are briefly shocked to see what their fearless leader is doing.. He's dancing his boxers singing, "Oops I did it again." He tries to dance faster, but trips and falls down, laughing like crazy as he takes out his thousand dollar lamp. Meowth grinned ear to ear. "Soooo Boss. how about a raise?" The older man just looked up and with a stoned grin.  
  
James whispered to Jesse, "Isn't this wrong taking advantage of someone in this condition?" Jesse whispered back, "Don't be silly! This is when people do the stupidest things!"  
  
QUICK SCENE CHANGE TO THE OVAL OFFICE  
  
In a smoke filled room we see an older man with his elder friends. It is apparent that they all have a blunt. All of a sudden, one of the men, George Bush Jr. jumps up shouting, "I'm going to run for president!" His friend Newt Gingreg, high as a kind yells, "Bitching!" Meanwhile Ronald Reagen is in the back practicing his trickle town theory after drinking too much beer.  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
There is an empty stretch of road. . . . . . . . .  
  
We pan over to. another empty stretch of road.  
  
. . . . . .  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO A SIDE STORY UNTIL WE CAN FIGURE OUT WHERE THE HELL ASH AND CO. ARE.  
  
An announcer is saying, "Welcome to the 2000 Olympic in Sydney, Australia. It's a beautiful day for the 10-meter dive. And I must say that the athletes of these fine countries are looking good. Helga Guggenheim of Japan has just completed a very nice triple summersault. and the judges give her an average score of 9.8!!! A very nice score indeed!"  
  
A woman dressed in black with greenish skin and a pointed hat walks up to the platform. "And coming up now is, the wicked witch of the west, diving for her country of OZ. I don't know much about his country, but from the show on HBO, apparently it's a prison colony. and here's the dive."  
  
She dives off the platform, twisting twice, and back flipping once, then enters the water very smoothly. As soon as she lands in the pool the starts to foam and melt, screaming in pain. Smoke rises from the melting carcass. "Oooooo" The announcer says, "A nice dive, but melting upon impact is going to cost her dearly."  
  
A very very muscular, and unusually hairy woman from Germany watches this. then says, (in a strangely deep manly voice), "I'm not diving until they clean that up!"  
  
Standing next to her is Rifiki, "Don't worry dear, I want to get me some of that! It'll look GREAT next to Gaston's corpse!" Then the sick little monkey dives into the pool to scoop out what he can.  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Ash is sitting on a stump muttering, "Gotta catch them all, Gotta catch them all. jesus, I don't know how much longer this brain-washing conspiracy can stay hidden." Misty agreed, "Yeah, its only a matter of time before the parents find out that the marshmallows in Pokemon cereal are laced with Agent X-130, that mind control drug."  
  
A voice off screen says, "Guys, GUYS! You're on AIR!!!" Ash quickly looks at you, and says, "Ummm. that was just a joke! Here, Misty will prove it by eating some of the cereal."  
  
Ash pulls a bowl from behind him, in typical cartoon fashion, and hands it to Misty, who in return smacks it out of his hands yelling, "NOT on your life!" This scene is thankfully broken up by Brock. "So. what did you learn from this whole experience?"  
  
Ash thought for a moment, "I learned that if you bribe the censors, you can get away with a lot of shit!" Misty piped in, "And when people flame you through email, it's ok, cause eventually they will be killed in a pokemon-attack accident."  
  
Ash chuckled evilly, "yeah. accident." Brock looked around, "Where's Pikachu and Togepi?" Misty said, "oh, they are around back, Pikachu is trying to teach Togepi how to act cute to get endorsements! Hey wait a minute. where's Tracey?"  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO THE OLYMPICS  
  
Tracey is on the edge of the pool watching Rifiki pull the melting corpse of the witch out of the pool. "This is going to be a sweet sketching." Tracey said to himself as he quickly drew on his pad.  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO THE MAIN STORY  
  
"Oh don't worry," Ash said, "I am sure he'll be back eventually." Brock just mumbled. The 3 are just sitting on rocks now. . Ash picks up a stone and throws it. . . . Misty lets out a yawn. . . . . . .  
  
Finally Brock says, "Sooo. how are we going to end this?" Ash and Misty looked at each other. after a moment of silence, Ash said, "I dunno, usually the announcer ends the story, but he left!" Misty thought of a moment, then said, "I guess its up to us. how about we do this?"  
  
POSSIBLE ENDING #1  
  
Brock is alone on the scene with cheesy music playing. "So kids, I hope you learned a lesson today. Playing with giant motorized penises isn't a good idea. If some of your friends want you to play with giant motorized penises, you just tell them no. that's the cool thing to do. This pokemon, and we'll see you soon!"  
  
BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Ash scratched his head. "Hmmm. I think that one is too 80's cartoons." "Well then, we could always do this." Brock suggested.  
  
ANOTHER ENDING SUGGESTION  
  
Ash, Misty, Tracey and Brock are sitting trying to decide what ending to use. Then all of a sudden. GLASS SHATTERS Austin music plays!  
  
JR: "Oh my god, Austin is back! And he is making a Bee Line for those kids!"  
  
Jerry "The King" Lawler: "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"  
  
Austin runs in, and runs to Tracey first, giving him a solid kick to the stomach, then finishing off the move with his patented move, the stunner! Tracey flies back out cold. Austin then turns to Brock and gives him the same..  
  
JR: "Oh my god, Stunner on Tracey, Stunner on Brock! Austin is out of control!"  
  
Jerry "The King" Lawler: "AHHHHHHHH!"  
  
Misty tries to escape, but Austin spins her around, flips her off and gives her a solid stunner sending her down out cold also!  
  
JR: "Oh my god, now Austin has stunned that little girl!"  
  
Jerry "The King" Lawler: "AHHHHHH! Puppies, kitties, AHHHHHH!"  
  
Ash tries to throw out a pokeball, but is stopped by also receiving a Stone Cold Stunner, Ash flies back and joins his friends in unconsciousness!  
  
JR: "Oh my god, Austin has wiped out all those kids! But can you imagine what is going to happen next week on RAW???"  
  
Jerry "The King" Lawler: "AHHHHHH!"  
  
SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
Misty looked at Brock. "I think that's just 'too WWF' for this type of story." "Yeah, you might be right," Brock replied. "Hey, I got it!" Ash exclaimed.  
  
YET ANOTHER ENDING  
  
ANNOUNCER, "And finally Ash Ketchup finally achieved his goal of becoming the greatest pokemon master of all time, beating everyone he has ever met, and never losing one single battle."  
  
QUICKLY BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
"Yeah right" Misty scoffed, "This is Pokemon, Ash, not "The Twilight Zone"." Ash just grunted towards her. Brock then said, "How about this one?"  
  
YET ONE MORE ENDING  
  
Ash is walking away from Misty, who says, "But Ash, what will I do? Where will I go???" Ash tips his hat and says to her, "Frankly misty my dear, I don't give a rattata's ass." Then turns and leaves.  
  
BACK TO MAIN STORY  
  
"Gone with the Wind?" Ash asked, "I really don't think we should be making fun of a classic like that. How about an ending where Gary dies?  
  
"I think that'd be a little violent, don't you?" Brock asked. "Man." Misty said, "I cant believe it could be so hard to come up with an ending." Ash nodded his head, "Who would think it would be so hard to come up with an ending?"  
  
FINAL SCENE CHANGE TO A ROOM WITH WALT DISNEY AND HIS WRITERS.  
  
Walt says, "So what I think, in the final scene, why don't we have Snow White put on a baseball cap, turn it backwards, and says, Dwarfs, gotta catch them all?"  
  
The writers shake their heads, one says, "I dunno Mr. Disney, do you really think any kids would be interested in a line like that?" Walt shrugged, "I guess your right, how about you put one more stupid song in?" "You Got it!"  
  
FADE TO BLACK  
  
FADE INTO A MAN SITTING AT A TABLE.  
  
The man looks at the screen gives a smile and says, "Thank you for reading this fan fic. I, and all of the writers hope you enjoyed this story and if you so, please feel free to email Edward and tell him how great this story was, and how he should be a god for the little people in this world. I am sure he'll appreciate it. Also feel free to request a sequel for the thought is there. we can always belt one out if only to make money through the merchandising alone. Thank you once again, and have a very, very pleasant night.. . . . (leaning over to a guy offscreen) That ought to keep the little bastards happy. . What do you mean, we are still taping??? Oh shit.  
  
QUICK FADE TO BLACK  
  
THE END!  
  
THE SEQUAL "GOING TO SCHOOL 2: MORE MADNESS" coming within 48 hours!!!! Look for it!!! 


End file.
